


Epiphany

by orphan_account, thefrenchman



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: A_F_WolfSlinx is the greatest editor, Crack, M/M, The greatest thing Ive ever done, like how has no one else had this idea yet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-02
Updated: 2015-03-02
Packaged: 2018-03-15 22:18:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3464105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account, https://archiveofourown.org/users/thefrenchman/pseuds/thefrenchman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Eggsy has his life effectively ruined forever and ever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Epiphany

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic. Ever. It is not at all serious. I just wanted to make all of the coming home fics a little funnier. Also, how is this not already out there?

Eggsy understood that things never worked out the way he expected them to. He did. Really, he did.

He really got that. He had even compiled a list of times things had gone south. Mostly the major things like (1)Dad dying, (2)Dean, in general, (3) his short lived stint in the Marines, and (4)Harry Hart.

Not because Harry had apparently been shot dead between the eyes after slaughtering an entire church full of, well, ...utter arseholes. (He'd actually been meaning to scratch that last one off for a while.) There also had been that entire business where the Kingsmen had thought he was dead. 

That had only lasted until they had arrived from Valentine’s lair (man-cave? house party?) all bloody and beaten, and the posh git had just been sitting there. In Arthur’s chair. Elegantly holding a glass between his fingers that reflected the morning light onto the table. Instead of feeling his heart jump into his throat, Eggsy had experienced what could only be described an epiphany.

It happened so quickly that Eggsy couldn’t even distract his mind with the fact that Harry bloody Hart was sitting, perfectly poised, just across the room. 

_You had my heart, and we’ll never be worlds apart,  
Maybe in magazines, but you’ll still be my star. ___

God no. Not now.

Even after that terrible revelation it still took a few seconds for Eggsy to shake off the shock that Harry was still alive. He was operating almost entirely on the, surprisingly exceptional, in-flight coffee and adrenaline; even saving the world and bummin’ a princess could only do so much to keep one alert when one hadn't slept for almost two whole days. As soon as he was over it, he slid straight over the table and dashed across the room to tackle-hug Harry with as much gusto as he could muster.

He was back. Harry hadn't left him alone. Harry promised he would come back, and he had. Eggsy loosened his vice-grip on Harry and just looked into his eyes for a moment, watching the sun twinkle a bit in the corner and- oh wait, oh god, no nono-

_When the sun shines we’ll shine together_  
 _Told you I'd be here forever_  
 _Said you'll always be my friend_  
 _Took an oath Imma stick it out to the end_

Eggsy didn't witness the confusion in Harry's eyes as he pulled away and ran frantically from the room. He could think of nothing other than what he had seen hanging on the coat rack behind Harry’s head. 

It hung there, from it's flawlessly crafted wooden handle, neatly wrapped Kevlar in all it’s glory, that…

Sleek….  
Black…

_Umbrella. ___


End file.
